Character and standards

 Developmental psychologist Tom Lickona explains good character as a composite of moral knowing, moral feeling and moral acting.

Moral Knowing

Moral Awareness. Moral knowing means, first of all taking the time to think – to make a moral judgement about what is right and what is wrong. It is being aware that a particular situation involves moral issues.
Knowing moral values. The second element of moral knowing involves knowing those values that we use to distinguish right from wrong – values such as honesty, respect, kindness, compassion, courage and responsibility. Knowing moral values also involves understanding how they apply to various circumstances.
Perspective-taking. A third element of moral knowing is being able to understand someone else’s point of view. Can you step into another person’s shoes and figure out how he or she might think or react or feel if you take certain action?
Moral reasoning. The fourth element of moral knowing is moral reasoning. It helps us answer such questions as: Why should I study for my history exam? Why should I stand up for my little brother? Why should I volunteer to serve meals once a week at the local homeless shelter? Why should I call that girl I promised to call? Why do you do something can be just as important as what you do. We all know that people can do the right thing for the wrong reasons. As people develop and mature, they learn to distinguish between morally acceptable reasons for doing something and morally unacceptable reasons for acting. Some of the right reasons for doing things include showing respect for someone’s worth as a person and treating others the way you would want to be treated.
Self-knowledge. A fifth aspect of moral knowing is self-knowledge. It includes such things as honestly assessing your attitudes and behaviour, understanding your motives, being aware of your strengths and weaknesses and knowing how to compensate for your weaknesses.

Decision-making. Good decision-making depends on the previous five elements. Once you:
- are aware that a situation demands moral judgement.
- Know which moral values to apply to your situation.
- Can take the perspective of others affected by the situation.
- Are able to reason morally and
- Can assess your motives, strengths and weaknesses, then you are ready to decide what course of action is best in a given situation.

Good decision-making requires figuring out what your options are, determining their probable consequences for everyone affected by your actions and then evaluating which option is best from both a moral and practical standpoint. The key question you need to answer here is this: Among those options that are morally acceptable, which are less likely to have the best consequences for everyone involved?

Moral feeling

Just knowing what is right isn’t always enough. A person must also care about what is right. Your moral emotions can help you do the right thing.
Conscience. It is important to understand that the feeling we’re talking about is not simply your emotions. Rather, it’s an appreciation for what is right. The appreciation helps you put aide other feeling and gives you the desire to do what is right. That’s where conscience, one element of moral feeling, enters the picture. Your conscience can help you decide what emotion to act upon. A healthy conscience can help us resist temptation by making us feel guilty when we do something wrong – or sometimes even before we do it.
Self-respect. A second element of moral feeling, or the emotional side of character, is self-respect. How you feel about yourself can help you make the right choices and treat other people with respect.
Empathy. Persons of good character are also capable of empathy, another element of moral feeling. Empathy is the capacity to feel what another person feels.

Moral Action

Good character includes more that knowledge and feeling; it involves action – moral action. Unfortunately, moral acting doesn’t always follow moral knowing and moral feeling. Sometimes it’s hard to do what is right, even if you know what is right and want to do it. That is why the following are so important.
Moral competence. The first element of moral acting is moral competence. Moral competence consists of the skills and abilities you need to turn moral thinking and feeling into moral behaviour.
Willpower. A second element of moral acting is willpower. (It is the element of character that helps people to press through difficult times toward a specific goal.)
Habit. A third element of moral acting is habit. People with good character have made a habit of choosing what is right. United States Senator Dan Coats of Indiana puts it this way: “Character cannot be summoned at the moment of crisis if it has been squandered by years of compromise and rationalization … The only preparation for that one profound decision which can change a life, or even a nation, is those hundreds of half-conscious, self-defining, seemingly insignificant decisions made in private. Habit is the daily battleground of character.”

Like the concept of habit, good character in general can be seen as a decision. Every day we are faced with decisions that test our character. When we make choices based on desire to keep our character intact, we build character-muscles that will grow in strength and reliability. Because we cannot foresee the daily choices that ill teat our character, it is vitally important that we keep our character-muscles in tune.
NO APOLOGIES the truth about love, life and sex.